When I can't find anything of any particular significance to write about, I usually just scour the news for whatever interesting topic pops up. Today...
Mr. Lennon here would like to remind everyone to donate to the cause of One Laptop Per Child. Though I understand that John Lennon was a firm believer of the imagination's ability to change the world, I hardly believe that he ever said the word "laptop," let alone know what a laptop is. You may be a non-profit organization with a commendable cause, but this falls under the sick notion of exploiting the spirit of a dead entertainer to further a fundraising effort or business enterprise. Shame on you, One Laptop Per Child.
Worst part? Yoko Ono approves of this.
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According to an American academic, rap battles originated in medieval Scottish pubs.
Say what?
Yes, Professor Ferenc Szasz's research has established a theory that the first "rap battles" occurred in medieval pubs in the form of "flyting," in which two performers entertain the audience by trading elaborate insults in verse and form. Scottish slave owners took the tradition to the United States, where it was adopted by slaves and eventually evolved into the form we know and love today.
He says:"The Scots have a lengthy tradition of flyting - intense verbal jousting, often laced with vulgarity, that is similar to the dozens that one finds among contemporary inner-city African-American youth. Both cultures accord high marks to satire. The skilled use of satire takes this verbal jousting to its ultimate level - one step short of a fist fight."
Interesting point, Professor. I decided to put my own research into this, and have excerpted a modern rap battle, and a popular flyting contest from medieval times. The similarities are all there, including a form, a rhyming scheme, and references to popular culture (of their times, of course.)
First, take an excerpt from one of the battles as portrayed by Eminem in the popular 2002 movie, 8 Mile:
[Lotto]
...I feel bad I gotta murder that dude from leave it to beaver.
I used to like that show now you got me in fight back mode.
But oh well if you gotta go ... then you gotta go.
I hate to do this. I would love for this shit to last.
So I’ll take pictures of my rear end so you won’t forget my ass.
And all is well that ends ok.
So I’ll this shit with a ... fuck you but have a nice day!
[B-Rabbit]
Ward I think you were a little hard on the Beaver.
So was Eddie Haskel, Wally and Ms. Cleaver.
This guy keeps screamin hes paranoid.
Quick someone get his ass another steroid!
Blah-de-bee-bee, blah blah blah-be-dee-, blooh-blah.
I didn’t hear a word you said ... hippity-hoo blah.
Is that a tank top or a new bra?
Look Snoop Dogg has got a fucking boob job!...
And here, I take an excerpt from The Flyting of Dumbar and Kennedie, a popular and well documented flyte, circa some time in the 1300s:
[Quod Dunbar to Kennedy]
Bot wondir laith wer I to be ane baird,
Flyting to use richt gritly I eschame;
For it is nowthir wynning nor rewaird,
Bot tinsale baith of honour and of fame,
Incres of sorrow, sklander, and evill name;
Yit mycht thay be sa bald, in thair bakbytting,
To gar me ryme and rais the feynd with flytting,
And throw all cuntreis and kinrikis thame proclame.
[Quod Kennedy to Dumbar]
Dirtin Dumbar, quhome on blawis thow thy boist?
Pretendand the to wryte sic skaldit skrowis;
Ramowd rebald, thow fall doun att the roist,
My laureat lettres at the and I lowis;
Mandrag, mymmerkin, maid maister bot in mows,
Thrys scheild trumpir with ane threid bait goun,
Say _Deo mercy_, or I cry the doun,
And leif thy ryming, rebald, and thy rowis.
We sure have come a long way since then.
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This article is a bit old, but I am proud to have my hometown be featured on an article on a news network that is featured and read all around the world. In October, BBC Science and Environment News declared the Hayward Fault to be the 'world's most dangerous fault.'
And might I clarify that 'most dangerous fault' indicates that the fault is considered dangerous because of the fact that the probability of the Hayward fault producing a large earthquake in the next 30 years is high coupled with the fault running through a major urban area, not the crime rate associated with the city, is what makes it the most 'dangerous,' as my friend originally thought.
Anyways...Would you look at that? They've got a picture of our City Hall on the page.
I'm almost proud to have my humble town be featured on a major news network, and even more proud that I found the article through digg.
"I totally thought that was a penis on my McDonald's bag, but it was really a chess piece"
-KE
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